Oh the funny stories

First off, let me just admit this is a hard time. I'm really struggling to let go of my own will and plans and hopes and just turn it all over to God. To be honest, there are many moments where it just doesn't make sense to me. What I want is not contrary to God's teachings, but the place that I have given it in my heart is, and that's why I'm dealing with this now. My heart, my mind, and my soul all belong to the Lord. Period. I've tried to take them out of His loving hands though, and fit His will to mine. And so, almost Jonah-like, He has sent the very clear message that I need to turn around put Him back where He belongs in my life. I alternate between being excited about the plans He has in store for me, to frustrated as to why He won't just give me a little hint as to what it is, to angry at Him for taking away what I thought was "the one." However, the message that He is throwing at me right now is not to sulk and be angry, but to turn this into praise and a source of glory for His name. My verse for the day this morning was from Psalms, and came exactly at my first point of weakness for the day...tell me God doesn't exist, yeah right! You will show me the way of life, granting me the JOY of Your presence, and the pleasures of living with You forever. Psalm 16:11 That's right, His presence is to be a source of joy for me, and He WILL show me the way of life and give me a place to dwell with Him forever.

The other message that I am hearing over and over is "Be still, and know that I am GOD." I'm not sure that really made sense to me ever before, but as an amazing friend told me so beautifully last night, it basically means to shut it and listen! Stop listing your worries, letting the things of this world control your life, and just, listen. He is with you, every moment, you just need to be aware of it. He loves you, and He wants you to love Him with everything you have. He is your Best Friend, your Father, your Lover, and your completion.

Now, I'm still reading the C. S. Lewis compilation, which has so many great passages. Also, Desiring God's Will is in my bag and a book called Make Me Like Jesus (it had cool, clay-covered hands on the cover!). I'm working through those right now, and then a friend sent me a great article/booklet/pdf file this morning that I really like so far. It is short and really a cool design, so pass it on if you haven't already read it :) Here's the link to the high-quality pdf, so no excuses! http://www.boundless.org/girls/flashversion.html

There was something else, but I'm definitely a little scatter-brained right now. I've got lots of really uplifting, encouraging Christian music playing on repeat, and K-LOVE is totally earning all my business when I'm in the car. Definitely try making a God loves me playlist though, because His words in song are like those of your best friend, sitting there pumping you up and telling you how awesome and beautiful you are, and how much He has in store for your future.