swamped

my brain is in mega-overload this year.  let's just say it's been quite a whirlwind.  to put it lightly. 
life updates are pretty unnecessary, as this is really just a blog where i blurt all my thoughts out into space. 

i will say i've learned evermore what real forgiveness looks like, and who is actually willing to give it.  i'm also continually learning about what my faith is outside of the bubble of college and my parents' wings.  i think that's a good thing, it's not as if i'm questioning the authority or the supremacy of the Gospel, just trying to see for myself what living it out means in my own sphere of influence. 

although i definitely adhere to the teaching that faith isn't based solely on actions and endless rules, i do think there is either too little or too much emphasis put on this particular truth.  so many Christ-followers, and i'll admit to being one of them on occasion, seem to use this as an excuse to act in the ways of the world.  we do things, we speak words, we treat others, and we use our time in ways that are not adhering to the Gospel of Christ, then hide behind the excuse that it's not about rules and regulations.  don't get me wrong, i'm not saying that you earn your way to Heaven; i do wholly believe that Christ is the One and Only way to bridge the gap between us and God, created by the original sin in the Garden of Eden and perpetuated by every human since Adam and Eve.  however, as Paul speaks truth to Timothy, we Christians must also speak truth to our own youth, and admonish them when they err in their pursuit of Christ. 

although we younguns like to think we have it all figured out, that is the pride and downfall of youth; we know nothing, but think that we know everything.  maybe it's the fresh ink on our diplomas, or the carefree lifestyle of one who is free of many obligations that come later in life, but it appears that we young adults are happy to spout off advice from our limited experience as if our words are the true gospel!  i can admit that i have so often eaten my words, and even regretted my actions, even as immediately as a second afterwards.  sometimes though, my pride refuses to admit that i've been wrong, that i have been led astray by my own foolish whims, or simply that i am a sinner, in need of redemption. 

thank God above that He offers such grace and mercy.  regardless of where i am in life, where anyone is or has been, He offers up a gift of salvation so abundant and unfathomable that often we are too blind or prideful to see and accept it.  may we dwell on this truth, as we are commanded to think about all that is good and true and holy and pure.  let us not waste our youth. 

i pray for wisdom, deep and abiding wisdom, to penetrate the hearts of those around me, and my own errant heart as well.
i pray for peace for those in pain.
i pray for healing for hurt, for relationships that have been broken and have broken those that are a part of them.
i pray for joy, to celebrate the gift of life, sunshine, pretty flowers, great books, days without alarms or obligations, coffee, and everything else that God has given us.
i pray for guidance, for God and His Word and His Son and His Holy Spirit are the North Star.
i pray for patience.  because i don't know a soul in this world who doesn't need an extra dose of patience.
i pray for generosity, as so many i see have so much, and then there are children in my classroom who only eat what the school cafeteria can provide, and my heart is broken for them.
i pray for love, for the love of others is second only to love for God, and selfishness and solitude are bitter pills, though often candy-coated and brightly-colored to disguise the danger.
i pray for the Gospel to change the world as it has changed my life.  may the Truth penetrate the hearts and minds and souls of every man and woman and child, that they too might have eternal Life.