one more thought about the whole issue of healing after a wound thing.
if you pick at scabs, it only takes them longer to heal.
if you go about your business as if you don't have a wound, that also can bite you in the rump.
if you revisit the wound and re-injure yourself similarly, ouch ouch ouch and scar scar scar.
if you're an idiot, you'll do all of the things listed above while attempting to heal.
rather, rest in the loving arms of Jesus and allow Him to apply grace and truth and healing to your self, so you might glorify and honor His name in and as a result of His continuous presence and devotion. use the times when you're down to thoroughly examine your heart and discern if it is aligned with the will of God and His mission.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
openness after a wound
have you ever noticed that right after you skin your knee, it's beyond painful when you bend it? i remember once when i, in my utter clumsiness, ran into a parking lot pole on a bicycle at the beach. the worst part wasn't even the humiliation of face-planting after having attempted to rescue myself by grabbing onto the pole itself; rather it was walking home after the fact. the. whole. stinking. two. miles. it wouldn't have been so blasted awful if my knees hadn't been attempting to scab over while i was bending them in the process of, oh you know, walking? thinking back to that delightful experience makes me cringe even now...and reach down to rub my suddenly tender knees.
granted, my thoughts today aren't about skint (is that even a word?) knees. more, i'd like to focus on the healing power of the Gospel.
to put it lightly, my knees are skint right now. figuratively speaking, thankfully. graduating from college, attempting this whole "grown-up" thing, teaching (although i love it, it's no walk in the park), breaking up with someone i truly thought i'd grow old with, and charting my next moves in life have all proven to be more challenging than it appears in the movies. however, every time i get down on myself and how rough life can be, i am put into place by either a sagacious friend speaking truth into my walk or the Word itself. most importantly, i have so very much for which i am thankful. i have a roof over my head, a sweet and loving family, a debt-free college experience (thanks mom and gramps!), fabulous friends, and so many fun experiences.
however, there are days when i forget all of this. there are days when i'm upset that my knees have ever been disrupted at all. do i deserve this, Lord, i ask? my wants are surpassed only by my inability to meet them; my needs have never failed to be abundantly met, but do i choose to focus on the good? everyone has something that challenges them in their life, and some more than others. the presence of evil and "hard knocks" does nothing to disrupt the goodness of God, and that is the truth which we are called to bind within our hearts. in fact, it is often the down times that bring us to our knees in prayer.
may we always be reminded that the Lord is wherever we are, that He is good, and that His goodness will never falter or be swayed by our errant hearts.
For the Lord is good, and His steadfast love endures forever: His faithfulness continues through all generations. Psalm 100:5
granted, my thoughts today aren't about skint (is that even a word?) knees. more, i'd like to focus on the healing power of the Gospel.
to put it lightly, my knees are skint right now. figuratively speaking, thankfully. graduating from college, attempting this whole "grown-up" thing, teaching (although i love it, it's no walk in the park), breaking up with someone i truly thought i'd grow old with, and charting my next moves in life have all proven to be more challenging than it appears in the movies. however, every time i get down on myself and how rough life can be, i am put into place by either a sagacious friend speaking truth into my walk or the Word itself. most importantly, i have so very much for which i am thankful. i have a roof over my head, a sweet and loving family, a debt-free college experience (thanks mom and gramps!), fabulous friends, and so many fun experiences.
however, there are days when i forget all of this. there are days when i'm upset that my knees have ever been disrupted at all. do i deserve this, Lord, i ask? my wants are surpassed only by my inability to meet them; my needs have never failed to be abundantly met, but do i choose to focus on the good? everyone has something that challenges them in their life, and some more than others. the presence of evil and "hard knocks" does nothing to disrupt the goodness of God, and that is the truth which we are called to bind within our hearts. in fact, it is often the down times that bring us to our knees in prayer.
may we always be reminded that the Lord is wherever we are, that He is good, and that His goodness will never falter or be swayed by our errant hearts.
For the Lord is good, and His steadfast love endures forever: His faithfulness continues through all generations. Psalm 100:5
Friday, May 25, 2012
the evolution of our faith.
why is it that our generation doesn't adhere to the faith in which we are raised?
is it because we genuinely believe we "outgrow" the religious background our parents provide?
is it due to the harsh judgment handed down by small-town churches that seem to have their critical voices amplified in the public sphere?
is it a result of our inability to reconcile our faith with the world that we see when we leave the nest?
is it the effect of too many late Saturday nights that lead to an aversion to anything other than a casual brunch late on Sunday mornings?
why is it that the collegiates are leaving church en masse?
i know this is a question that pastors and parents ponder periodically, as membership amongst my generation dwindles significantly across the nation. after having a late-night discussion with one of my very best friends, i started to analyze the same question that plagues our faith-leaders.
as a recent college graduate (okay, no longer so recent, it's been over a year...eek!), i like to believe that i know everything there is to know about life. i would love to believe that graduating from a prestigious university affords me all the knowledge that i'll ever desire. i've embarked on the journey of my professional career, i attend professional development, and i even have my very own dependent (#hersheyshoutout). i do lots of adult things, though i do still love to call mom to come "shopping" with me, which normally entails her buying me clothes...anyways, my point is that any truly enlightened person understands that they know absolutely nothing. every day is a new adventure. life can blindside you at any moment; north carolina had a stinking earthquake this past year. april was colder than march. adorable, sweet children die of hunger every day. billionaires give away their fortunes to strangers for the good of others. our world is twisted, unexpected, and no one knows it all. that's why it's wise to acknowledge the truth of our uncertainty and lack of control, accept that God has ordained our every breath, and embrace His sovereignty. what's interesting is that when you "outgrow" that, i have yet to figure out what you've grown into. i'd much rather believe that God is omnipotent, omnipresent, and omniscient than believe that God is just a novel concept for those seeking vague solace in times of desperation.
i do think that the media chooses to misrepresent Christianity as a faith; a lack of understanding of the true Gospel makes it difficult to truly grasp and portray the basis of belief. however, if you've grown up in church, this isn't news. every church in America, from the 25-member congregations of Mayberry to the megachurches of metropolitan areas, is filled to the brim with sinners. the notion of Christians as "better" than anyone else is purely Pharisee, and sinful at its core. it is our pride that is so often the root of the other sins that plague our human existence: adhering to the notion that attending church, tithing, or even serving devotedly in a ministry makes anyone a better or more deserving person is against the very message of the Gospel. now don't get me wrong, i believe in loving and serving our world, in living in a Christ-like manner, and in fellowship and worship as essential parts of a thriving faith. however, i believe that all of those aspects of faith are a result of the heart-belief that Christ is Lord, that He died for us, and that we ought to live our lives in response to this generous gift of salvation.
note: you can't earn your way into heaven, period. "it is with your heart that you believe and are justified..." Romans 10:10
perhaps we struggle simply because we sheltered children, after a life of hand-sanitizer and vaccinations, are confused as to how much evil and ineptitude we see in the world. that's a possibility, right? even in our own neighborhoods, there are families who can't afford to feed their children on the weekends. in our own families, there are people getting shot, being diagnosed with cancer or some other horrific disease, or losing a job they depended on to provide for their own needs and those of others. i know it's a terrible, mad world, but that's our own fault. we are the remnants, or rather the descendants, of the original sinners. we sin from the minute we begin to consciously make decisions as children; ask any parent of a toddler, and they will support this assertion. we are not "generally good people," even if we believe we are. perhaps it's not that we are openly angry or abusive, maybe we just don't give freely of our abundance. laziness pervades our personalities, as we cheat on papers and exams and assignments rather than take the time to do the work ourselves. greed exemplifies American society as a whole, and i don't even feel like i have to elaborate. we worship sex, love, liquor, singers, the opinions of others, the sun; the only Being worthy of praise orchestrated the creation of the world and everything in it. why glorify the chocolate chip when it's one of 15 in a perfectly-constructed banana-buttermilk-allpurposeflour-egg-vanilla-seasalt-blueberry-chocolatechip-butterinthepan concoction?
"every good and perfect gift is from above..." James 1:17
ultimately, i saved the hardest reason to confront for my last point. regardless of our excuses or objections, committing to faith is just that, a commitment. in our youth, we are encouraged to explore, adventure, embrace, and tolerate. the commitment that faith in Christ requires is messy, it gets in the way, it's tough, and it is a divisive decision when our society seems to have adopted the stance that the Christian faith is an outdated, unnecessary aspect of a well-rounded life. #nopainnogain is a marathon motto for a reason, folks. yes, sometimes it is difficult to reconcile the goodness of God with the evil and deceit and horrors we are privy to here on earth. often, i wonder what the "young and wild and free" crowd has that truly concerns them. every single Sunday, i wonder why the alarm seems to always go off too early to allow me to get a full night's rest. i'll respond to this point with two counter-arguments:
1. "You who are young, be happy while you are young, and let your heart give you joy in the days of your youth. Follow the ways of your heart and whatever your eyes see, but know that for all these things God will bring you to judgment." Ecclesiastes 11:9. this verse is one of my favorites, though for reasons that lie in the last part that I purposefully emphasized. although we are given the gift of joy and earthly pleasures, we are called to find our hearts so deeply engrossed in the pursuit of Christ that the delights of our hearts should align with His will. this verse, and others like it, aren't free passes to live like you have no boundaries in your youth; rather it is an open invitation to learn to dwell deeply in the beauty and brilliant Light of the Gospel while you are young and free to pursue Christ with the energy and exuberance that accompany youth.
2. grow up kids. the mark of a true adult isn't that it's now legal for you to stay out until you choose to come home, or that you can inhale alcoholic beverages with no regard for the presence of the A.L.E. the mark of an adult is shouldering responsibility for your actions, for your future, for your soul, and for the mission of Christ. so get out of bed, commit to serving and tithing, and act adult rather than claiming the perks without any of the effort. that's called friends with benefits, and we all know only mila kunis and justin timberlake made that work.
#ramblings
#inspired
-lc
is it because we genuinely believe we "outgrow" the religious background our parents provide?
is it due to the harsh judgment handed down by small-town churches that seem to have their critical voices amplified in the public sphere?
is it a result of our inability to reconcile our faith with the world that we see when we leave the nest?
is it the effect of too many late Saturday nights that lead to an aversion to anything other than a casual brunch late on Sunday mornings?
why is it that the collegiates are leaving church en masse?
i know this is a question that pastors and parents ponder periodically, as membership amongst my generation dwindles significantly across the nation. after having a late-night discussion with one of my very best friends, i started to analyze the same question that plagues our faith-leaders.
as a recent college graduate (okay, no longer so recent, it's been over a year...eek!), i like to believe that i know everything there is to know about life. i would love to believe that graduating from a prestigious university affords me all the knowledge that i'll ever desire. i've embarked on the journey of my professional career, i attend professional development, and i even have my very own dependent (#hersheyshoutout). i do lots of adult things, though i do still love to call mom to come "shopping" with me, which normally entails her buying me clothes...anyways, my point is that any truly enlightened person understands that they know absolutely nothing. every day is a new adventure. life can blindside you at any moment; north carolina had a stinking earthquake this past year. april was colder than march. adorable, sweet children die of hunger every day. billionaires give away their fortunes to strangers for the good of others. our world is twisted, unexpected, and no one knows it all. that's why it's wise to acknowledge the truth of our uncertainty and lack of control, accept that God has ordained our every breath, and embrace His sovereignty. what's interesting is that when you "outgrow" that, i have yet to figure out what you've grown into. i'd much rather believe that God is omnipotent, omnipresent, and omniscient than believe that God is just a novel concept for those seeking vague solace in times of desperation.
i do think that the media chooses to misrepresent Christianity as a faith; a lack of understanding of the true Gospel makes it difficult to truly grasp and portray the basis of belief. however, if you've grown up in church, this isn't news. every church in America, from the 25-member congregations of Mayberry to the megachurches of metropolitan areas, is filled to the brim with sinners. the notion of Christians as "better" than anyone else is purely Pharisee, and sinful at its core. it is our pride that is so often the root of the other sins that plague our human existence: adhering to the notion that attending church, tithing, or even serving devotedly in a ministry makes anyone a better or more deserving person is against the very message of the Gospel. now don't get me wrong, i believe in loving and serving our world, in living in a Christ-like manner, and in fellowship and worship as essential parts of a thriving faith. however, i believe that all of those aspects of faith are a result of the heart-belief that Christ is Lord, that He died for us, and that we ought to live our lives in response to this generous gift of salvation.
note: you can't earn your way into heaven, period. "it is with your heart that you believe and are justified..." Romans 10:10
perhaps we struggle simply because we sheltered children, after a life of hand-sanitizer and vaccinations, are confused as to how much evil and ineptitude we see in the world. that's a possibility, right? even in our own neighborhoods, there are families who can't afford to feed their children on the weekends. in our own families, there are people getting shot, being diagnosed with cancer or some other horrific disease, or losing a job they depended on to provide for their own needs and those of others. i know it's a terrible, mad world, but that's our own fault. we are the remnants, or rather the descendants, of the original sinners. we sin from the minute we begin to consciously make decisions as children; ask any parent of a toddler, and they will support this assertion. we are not "generally good people," even if we believe we are. perhaps it's not that we are openly angry or abusive, maybe we just don't give freely of our abundance. laziness pervades our personalities, as we cheat on papers and exams and assignments rather than take the time to do the work ourselves. greed exemplifies American society as a whole, and i don't even feel like i have to elaborate. we worship sex, love, liquor, singers, the opinions of others, the sun; the only Being worthy of praise orchestrated the creation of the world and everything in it. why glorify the chocolate chip when it's one of 15 in a perfectly-constructed banana-buttermilk-allpurposeflour-egg-vanilla-seasalt-blueberry-chocolatechip-butterinthepan concoction?
"every good and perfect gift is from above..." James 1:17
ultimately, i saved the hardest reason to confront for my last point. regardless of our excuses or objections, committing to faith is just that, a commitment. in our youth, we are encouraged to explore, adventure, embrace, and tolerate. the commitment that faith in Christ requires is messy, it gets in the way, it's tough, and it is a divisive decision when our society seems to have adopted the stance that the Christian faith is an outdated, unnecessary aspect of a well-rounded life. #nopainnogain is a marathon motto for a reason, folks. yes, sometimes it is difficult to reconcile the goodness of God with the evil and deceit and horrors we are privy to here on earth. often, i wonder what the "young and wild and free" crowd has that truly concerns them. every single Sunday, i wonder why the alarm seems to always go off too early to allow me to get a full night's rest. i'll respond to this point with two counter-arguments:
1. "You who are young, be happy while you are young, and let your heart give you joy in the days of your youth. Follow the ways of your heart and whatever your eyes see, but know that for all these things God will bring you to judgment." Ecclesiastes 11:9. this verse is one of my favorites, though for reasons that lie in the last part that I purposefully emphasized. although we are given the gift of joy and earthly pleasures, we are called to find our hearts so deeply engrossed in the pursuit of Christ that the delights of our hearts should align with His will. this verse, and others like it, aren't free passes to live like you have no boundaries in your youth; rather it is an open invitation to learn to dwell deeply in the beauty and brilliant Light of the Gospel while you are young and free to pursue Christ with the energy and exuberance that accompany youth.
2. grow up kids. the mark of a true adult isn't that it's now legal for you to stay out until you choose to come home, or that you can inhale alcoholic beverages with no regard for the presence of the A.L.E. the mark of an adult is shouldering responsibility for your actions, for your future, for your soul, and for the mission of Christ. so get out of bed, commit to serving and tithing, and act adult rather than claiming the perks without any of the effort. that's called friends with benefits, and we all know only mila kunis and justin timberlake made that work.
#ramblings
#inspired
-lc
Friday, May 18, 2012
saying goodbye.
i'm not willing to settle.
i need someone who makes me melt
inside and out
who can laugh with me when i make friends with the cashier at home depot
and hold my hand and kiss it in the car
who can gaze into my eyes while i cry
or dance in the thunderstorms
who can love me in these redhead gone-wild-wanna-leave-life-
and in my wants to sit close on the porch swing and read books mood
who can be silly with me in public
and take me out to a nice quiet dinner in a fancy restaurant and talk sweet
who can meet my family and impress them
but who can get grimy and shoot guns and drive a truck
who can respect my need for diamonds
and tahoes
who can sway with me to country music
whether he likes the music or not
who can tell me i look smokin
or beautiful in the same sentence
who can sit with me while i'm under the weather and make me feel beloved, but not crowd my space
who can love Jesus
and a good friday night
who can snuggle me on the couch
and go on a bike ride
and go visit pony-baby
i need someone who makes me swoon the same way you did
who puts that sparkle in my step
who makes me want to be a better woman
who makes me wanna stay up all night talking
even though it makes me ugly in the morning
who forces me to embrace life and youth and moments of bliss
i wanna love somebody like that
and i want them to love me like that too
i could settle for someone who's going to love me more than i love them
but i don't believe in that
it's going to be hard
to be utterly alone
no best friend
no lover
no fighter :)
but
i want a love that puts ours to shame.
i'll always wish it was our love. but i respect that you know that i'm not it for you. i respect that you want to have the kind of love that i have for you, for someone else. i don't want you to settle for me. as much as i do, i want more for you than less than what you want.
i believe that God wants us to be joyful and beloved
and to fight for that feeling for the next fifty years
it won't always be easy
no matter who it is
there will be moments where you hate her
but
you are called to love.
you are designed to love
to forgive
to grow
and to see the redemption of Christ in the love you have for your spouse
i pray for that for you
i love you
i will never
stop
loving you
goodbye.
Thursday, May 17, 2012
ramblings.
thoughts today include: boys stink, both literally and figuratively. food must be balanced with exercise...which is so obviously the clearest way the Lord could teach me moderation. men look funny driving minivans, unless their wives are in the passenger seat, though even then i giggle. i pray i never have an only child, though i am thankful i was one. my musical taste is eclectic. i want to write a book, if only to remember my crazy life when i'm forty and frazzled. or twenty-three. i have awesome opportunities, and the only thing not awesome is not taking them. people can be really strange, fickle, moody, loving, funny, and unabashedly human. i think i cease to exist when i am absorbed in a book, or so my frantic phone tells me. i am amazed how quickly the heart heals...and how quickly it crumbles when not founded in the love of our Creator.
a morning.
praying for my children as they take the end-of-grades this week.
hoping they pass.
wishing people were more positive.
loving my kiddos.
hoping for a change.
dreaming of summer.
heading to the pool afterschool.
wondering what guy would drive a minivan.
pondering the awkward situation plaguing my early mornings.
feeling too much.
dwelling on rejection.
redirecting my attention to the Love of my God.
concentrating hard on the state of my fingernails.
lifting up prayers for those in pain.
frustrating the efforts of others to bring me down.
believing in joy, pie, bliss, smiling, freckles, and expression.
hoping they pass.
wishing people were more positive.
loving my kiddos.
hoping for a change.
dreaming of summer.
heading to the pool afterschool.
wondering what guy would drive a minivan.
pondering the awkward situation plaguing my early mornings.
feeling too much.
dwelling on rejection.
redirecting my attention to the Love of my God.
concentrating hard on the state of my fingernails.
lifting up prayers for those in pain.
frustrating the efforts of others to bring me down.
believing in joy, pie, bliss, smiling, freckles, and expression.
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
dwelling
I will always love Georgia font. I can't understand why everyone insists on Times New Roman. It looks so lifeless, bland, and nondescript. Let's fix that Microsoft? K thanks.
The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want. He maketh me lie down in green pastures...
I had the most delightful conversation yesterday with a beautiful friend about learning to rest, even as the world swirls madly around you. Although I'll admit, I need to learn to rest more in the Lord, in general, my life has been about learning to use wisdom and discernment about my calendar this year. It's strange, because I want to be so social and friendly, but if I overdo it, I don't have the energy and love to devote to my wards at school. If I'm overly committed to pouring into the kids, I forget to dwell on His Word and refocus my heart from its wanton affections. If I put all my being into one person, it can be ripped out from under me and leave me at a complete loss of who I am.
My identity is found in Christ.
Not in the person I date.
Or eventually marry.
Or in my career.
Or in my friends.
Or my social life (or lack thereof, I'm a first-year teacher y'all).
Or in my hair.
Or in my weight.
Or in my clothes.
Or in my material possessions.
My heart is so prone to wander Lord, I feel it. As the hymn goes, I beg of the Lord to take my heart and seal it for His courts above, because I have no greater mission than to be His and His alone. Whether I make a billion dollars in life, or never buy a new car ever ever again, I am here to glorify His name and His kingdom and His mission.
May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing to You, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.
The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want. He maketh me lie down in green pastures...
I had the most delightful conversation yesterday with a beautiful friend about learning to rest, even as the world swirls madly around you. Although I'll admit, I need to learn to rest more in the Lord, in general, my life has been about learning to use wisdom and discernment about my calendar this year. It's strange, because I want to be so social and friendly, but if I overdo it, I don't have the energy and love to devote to my wards at school. If I'm overly committed to pouring into the kids, I forget to dwell on His Word and refocus my heart from its wanton affections. If I put all my being into one person, it can be ripped out from under me and leave me at a complete loss of who I am.
My identity is found in Christ.
Not in the person I date.
Or eventually marry.
Or in my career.
Or in my friends.
Or my social life (or lack thereof, I'm a first-year teacher y'all).
Or in my hair.
Or in my weight.
Or in my clothes.
Or in my material possessions.
My heart is so prone to wander Lord, I feel it. As the hymn goes, I beg of the Lord to take my heart and seal it for His courts above, because I have no greater mission than to be His and His alone. Whether I make a billion dollars in life, or never buy a new car ever ever again, I am here to glorify His name and His kingdom and His mission.
May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing to You, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.
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